I CAN'T HELP

hating everything right now!

I'm going through something right now,
why can't anyone understand that?
I'm trying to force a smile on my face for
everyone I see, just so they won't know,
because I know they're just not gonna get it.
I'll be written off as a bitch.

Of course, the one person I choose to confide in,
is taking this personally, even though it has nothing to do with him.

Fuck this.
I'm trying to deal with myself as best I can
but it gets harder when I have to defend
the fact that I'm just not the same anymore.
Since when is it a crime to change?

Sure, everyone loves it when you change for the better,
but hey.
Sometimes you change for the worse and you're okay with it.
Which makes me realize:
Better and worse is relative.

Who's to say that I'm a worse person now?
I'm still sticking to my own moral code,
so I'm not any worse, I'm just
different.
and different is okay in my book.


This makes me have a little more respect
for the people I've lost along the way.
It wasn't about me,
they just changed,
and change is always good.
It's a sign that you are moving,
and as long as you're moving,
you are alive.