Shouldn't you know everything about me by now?

You should see the guys I talk to.

M - I should probably chill. I'm mostly just
mad that I shaved my legs. Sooo much surface area,
all for naught.

D - For someone so boring, you're a real piece of
work. What do you even have going for you?
And why do I even bother anymore?
Prime example of why good guys stay single,
because girls like me keep coming back to
nutsacks like you. You've never asked me
how my day went.

T - Not really the big bad asshole you
make yourself out to be. But I can't deal with
everything that happened in your past.
It's too much for me.
Plus we're just at different places in our lives.
Hopefully you'll never want to make it official
because I don't want you to be the one
that gets hurt. again.



I don't believe in love at first sight,
but if I did, I would be in love with Andy Hull.
His wife must be the most blessed woman on earth
to wake up to his face every morning, and I mean that.
I have yet to find out anything about him that I don't enjoy.
I like to think he's pointing at me in this picture, and
saying " Yeah, I'll see you after the show. We'll have
a beer and I'll write you a song about pirates and goats.
Come visit me at home and we'll share smores by the fire
while my wife goes out shopping with her friends. Totally platonic though."

Yeah, that's what he's saying.